Editors: Adam Richards, Andy Thompson, Owen Richards with net facilities by Robbie Langton
And while we’re on the subject of lists, here’s a list
of our favourite Blake’s 7-fan jokes:
1. “HOW MANY BLAKE’S 7 FANS DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHTBULB”
None. They don’t change the lightbulb; they just sit there, watching Blake’s 7 in the dark. They don’t even go out to buy food, or toilet paper - I bet they just shit where they sit, probably.
2. “WHAT’S RED AND SCREAMS?”
A peeled Blake’s 7 fan in a sack of salt.
3. “WHAT’S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A BLAKE’S 7 FAN AND AN OLD TOILET?”
Nothing; they both smell of shit.
4. “HOW MANY BLAKE’S 7 FANS CAN YOU FIT INTO A TELEPHONE BOX?”
None: they won’t have anything to do with Doctor Who.
5. “WHAT’S RED, SCREAMS, AND GOES ROUND AND ROUND AND ROUND?”
A Blake’s 7 fan in a blender. Old ones are best!
6. “HOW DO YOU CONFUSE A BLAKE’S 7 FAN?”
Put him in a round room and tell him there’s a Blake’s 7 badge in the corner.
7. “WHAT DO BEES AND BLAKE’S 7 FANS HAVE IN COMMON?”
Hives.
8. “WHAT’S BLUE AND LIES IN THE GUTTER?”
A dead Blake’s 7 fan.
9. “HOW CAN YOU MAKE YOUR MOTHER CRY?”
Tell her you’re a Blake’s 7 fan.
10. “WHAT’S FUCK-UGLY, SMELLS OF SEMEN AND USES A WHOLE BOX OF KLEENEX?”
A Blake’s 7 fan watching “The Way Back”.
11. “WHY DID RUSSIA GET CHERNOBYL AND THE REST OF THE WORLD GET BLAKE’S 7 FANS?”
Russia had first choice.
12. “WHAT’S A BLAKE’S 7 FAN’S FAVOURITE FOOD?”
Food? You mean they eat?
13. “HOW DO YOU DRAW A BLAKE’S 7 FAN?”
Slit his stomach, shove your hand in and pull.
14. “WHAT’S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A BLAKE’S 7 FAN AND A BLOCK OF WOOD?”
The wood burns cleaner.
15. “WHAT’S GREEN AND LIVES IN A BLAKE’S 7 FAN’S ’FRIDGE?”
I don’t know - I daren’t look.
16. “WHAT’S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A VALENTINE’S DAY SINGING TELEGRAM AND A BLAKE’S 7 FAN?”
One’s a cupid stunt....
17. “HOW DO YOU KNOW WHEN A BLAKE’S 7 FAN IS DEAD?”
When he stops screaming.
18. “HAVE YOU HEARD ABOUT THE BLAKE’S 7 FAN WHO GOT A LIFE?”
No, neither have we.
19. “WHY CAN’T A BLAKE’S 7 FAN EVER PLAY SUPERMAN?”
No one would ever wear those underpants outside their tights.
20. “WHAT’S SILENT, EMPTY AND COVERED IN COBWEBS?”
A Blake’s 7 fan’s washing machine.
21. “WHY DON’T BLAKE’S 7 FANS EVER FART IN THE BATH?”
They don’t take baths.
22. “TEN PEOPLE IN A ROOM; ALL READING FANGROK: WHICH ONE’S THE BLAKE’S 7 FAN?”
The one who’s crying.
23. “HOW DO YOU SPOT A BLAKE’S 7 FAN IN A CROWD?”
He’s the one on the ground being kicked.
24. “WHAT’S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A COPY OF ‘RAZZLE’ AND A BLAKE’S 7 CONVENTION?”
You’ll find more tits at the Blake’s 7 Convention.
25. “WHY COULDN’T THE BLAKE’S FAN CROSS THE ROAD?”
He was stapled to the sofa.